我回来种花了！

嘿嘿 今天在MSN上讲话很有意思。

140. Some experts maintain that students learn best in a highly structured environment, one that emphasizes discipline, punctuality, and routine. Others insist that educators, if they are to help students maximize their potential, ought to maintain an atmosphere of relative freedom and spontaneity.

Explain your position on the issue of structure versus freedom in an ideal learning environment. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

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OUTLINE

1.A free atmosphere initiates creativity.
2.A free atmosphere inspires the potentialities.
3.However, anyone can not success without any decipline.

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The issue of which is the best environment for students to study is a complex one because it is a conflict between our humanity and the progress of learning (I suggest that instead of saying “conflict between our humanity and the progress of learning”, you merely repeat the argument in some way—see below). In my perspective, compared to a structured environment, studying in a relatively free atmosphere is more beneficial.

Intro Paragraph:
Version 1: Some experts argue that structured study environment helps develop in students discipline, punctuality and routine, characteristics that are highly valued because it creates order in our society. On the other hand, studying in a free environment maximizes students’ potentials and when individual’s potential is maximized, the society as a whole benefits in growth and innovation. I believe that compared to a tightly structured environment, studying in a relatively free environment is more beneficial

Version 2:  I believe that studying in a relative free atmosphere is more beneficial.

Body Paragraph #1:

A free atmosphere initiates creativity. There are many important qualities of a person who achieve success, such as hardwork, organized thinking, etc. [delete this sentence because it adds nothing to your topic sentence…] However, the greatest achievement or breakthrough in a field always is conducted by creative thinking. This creativity, so called inspiration, appears only in a relative relaxed environment. [These two sentences, you can keep if you are really running out of things to say, but if you have good examples that you can expand, do that instead.] There are lots of examples in the field of art. An artist likes to travel and spend a lot of time as he/she wishes. Some artists would even do this routinely to overcome the lack of inspiration.

Body Paragraph #1 read as this:

A free atmosphere initiates creativity. This can be seen in artists who spend half their time cultivating the environment for creativity. In searching for creativity, an artist may choose to go on inspiration-searching journeys, traveling to places away from their home town and spending as much time away from their drawing boards as needed to obtain the inspiration they need. [Ideally, here, you could give an example of one famous artist who does this to demonstrate your point; you know a lot about arts, so you should be able to give an example…]

-       Alternatively, you can also give current business examples: for example, Google gives their employees some time to get away from their normal routine work and work at being “creative”.

-       Talk first about how an atmosphere initiates creativity; then about why this creativity is important—getting back to the point of why you think free studying environment is more valued

-       Always support your points with examples, as specific as possible

-       Because this is such a short essay, make your example known right after topic sentence, and spend your time expanding that example instead of saying 空话 and have nothing to support on that.

Another key factor is that free atmosphere helps people achieve maximum potential. [add this sentence to elaborate on your topic sentence: This is because in a free atmosphere, people have more flexibility in choosing the way they accomplish a task, and they would usually work at a pace of their preference. OR you can go right onto example, 举反例 (Japanese) and then 举例say the good things, such as this: A valid instance occurs in education. The Japanese use strict discipline and heavy assignment to teach their children. The result is that Japanese could make one existing invention to its best with their high skills. But, at the same time, most Japanese lose their possible abilities to explore many unknown fields. To the contrast, Americans emphasize relative free environment to a young man in order to dig one’s potentiality out. So, it is not unbelievable that America could achieve the top in many fields, no matter ecomomy, politics, science and other fields.]

Although routine training could develop one’s ability which has already emerged above the sea, one’s potential ability can hardly be induced by routine training or strict discipline. The shown ability could only deal with existing issues, but the potentiality could resolve unknown problems which is more than existed. [I suggest delete these two sentences because they do not add value.]

Nevertheless, when a person needs to acquire a specific skill, he/she must follow strict discipline because both common sense and cognitive science have shown us that the best method to acquire a skill is through repeated practice with intense duration.

In sum, an ideal learning environment should mainly contain a free environment for students, thereby encouraging them to develop creativity and potentiality. At the same time, it is impossible to ignore the importance of routine and strict discipline to students, especially in high skill fields.